THANKSGIVING/GIVING THANKS

"PoorMeg seldom complained, but a sense of injustice made her feelbitter toward everyone sometimes, for she had not yet learnedto know how rich she was in the blessings which alone can make life happy."

Louisa May Alcott

"Gratitude." It’s a word that’s been tossed around a lot. I remember first hearing about it from Marabel Morgan’s Total Woman during the ‘70’s and I thought “what a load of crap.” Then during the ‘90’s Sarah Ban Breathnach came up with her “Gratitude Journal.” The idea left me cold.

And I got e-mails talking about how we should be grateful because we had electricity, running water, flush toilets and enough food when people in Zambia didn’t. Somehow that seemed like minimizing things. Ok, so I eat three meals a day and someone in Bangladesh doesn’t. But then my best friend/cousin/high school classmate/former co-worker is more attractive than I am, earns more money, gets the validation my family doesn’t give me. It’s supposed to make me feel good that I earn more/eat better than the average Bengali?

It was early 2006 when I heard someone from Prevention Magazine talking about people choosing to be happy. She suggested writing down three things every day that make one happy, even if it’s something as trite as "the grocery clerk smiled at me."

I figured “couldn’t hurt” and “how bad can it be?” so I tried it for about two weeks. It was exhausting. Then about a year later I heard about the “Secret” DVD which pitched the same idea “just think how you want to do more for grateful people than ungrateful ones, the universe feels the same way.” So I tried it again. And things started improving, at least a little. And even when they didn’t I didn’t feel nearly so bad about bad things happening.